Most people believe that having a relationship is just like practicing to be wife and husband that there are certain responsibility that you must face that’s why phobia of commitment arises. Now let me ask you, have you ever been single all throughout your life? Is having a perfect relationship makes you feel scared with unknown reason? Do you know what it feels to sleep alone crying and you don’t know anyone who is willing to lend a shoulder for you? Have you felt so shocked that your heart has torn into pieces because your relationship has ended? Do you know what it feels to be in a cold nights alone and you can only see a pillow whom you can hug? This is the real world; most of the people exactly know the answers to every question. Take note of the big “C”, the answer to the questions which means COMMITMENT. When you heard of that, your skin may get cold, shaking and your heart beats faster than normal.   Do you have a phobia in commitment? Let’s talk about overcoming the commitment phobia.

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A phobia of commitment is a fear of getting too close to a specific person or object most importantly to a relationship. Commitment phobic people are afraid of responsibilities attached to the relationship that they might not meet in the long run.   Thinking about their flaws and how to grow is an example of what they think before they wanted to be committed and then they will find it uninteresting.   This is like you wanted to buy a certain object and then you don’t know what to buy because you don’t know the details. Therefore, the decision of getting into a relationship depends on your thoughts about it. Thinking about what will happen negatively and won’t open herself to any possibilities that she might have a good relationship, then he just chose to make himself experience pain everyday.   You have permitted to be a victim of your own judgment and this can make you suffer. You should never permit such phobia to make you feel miserable. To help fight phobia here are some tips:

1.  Self–Awareness.  You always ask questions about why it has to be you but you know exactly the reason why.  It is normal that you will be undergoing the process of denial. But, don’t let denial overpower your life. Acceptance comes in when you know how to acknowledge your fear and this will help you get healed. 
2. Go to the process of elimination. Stop for a moment and look back what you have done why you have the phobia. Why you should avoid having a relationship? List down all your negative thoughts and slowly do away those thoughts for you to change the feeling deep inside of you.
3. Accept and Conquer the Fear. To find a way to conquer your fear is very important that is why you should first ask for a therapist. All of the relationship will have ups and downs. For you to be mature and better someday, then you must face the challenges in having a relationship, you must encounter some laughs and cries. Look at the brighter side, if you really have that fear then embrace it.

  It is always been your choice. Phobia of commitment would tell, “All men/women are jerks/bitch”, “they will just use me”, “they will get money out from me”, but those unjustified reasons would lead us lonely and unlucky in love.  Instead of using the phobia as a hindrance to your happiness, why not consider it as a help for you to be careful in finding love. Failing means you must stand up again and prove to them that you can do it.

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